1) How to spell your name? Lakshmi or Latchumi ?
Oh god, you’re and your is as different as Lakshmi and Latchumi.
2) Are all Tamilians ‘Brahmins’?
Are all Maharastrians Marwadis?
3) Don’t you ever get bored of eating Idli and Dosa always?
How’s that you never get bored of Rotis?
4) You eat Rice always?
Yeah I desire to abide by the mandate that was set forth in the highest confidence of all South-Indians.
5) Oh, you consume so much milk? Does that make you strong?
Yeah just like you’re raised to believe your strength comes from Chyawanprash and Bournvita.
6) Oh so all South Indians, love Rajnikanth ?
Guilty as charged. You love Kamal R Khan nah ? For he’s famous too !!
P.S Not comparing both of them, just putting forward that common stereotypes are not what they appear to be.
7) Can you teach me to tie a lungi?
OMG, what? Sure, just need to whip out that portable lungi wearing kit.
8) Can you teach me Lungi dance?
Oh that’s called a dance?? Sure except that I can’t take the ‘over-exorbitant stereotyping and objectification of Tamilians’ in that song.
9) If you’re Tamilian, how’s that you’re so beautiful?
That awkward moment, when you can’t gauge if it’s a compliment, or a crack
10) Oh you’re a madrasi? Are you from Kerala?
Yeah of course, please give me two minutes to recover from this shock of Confronted dumbness.
11) Can you please teach me something in Tamil?
Yeah, Na solren ne vaaye muudu. (Please Shut up) !
12) Why do you always apply coconut oil?
Why do you always color your hair with Henna?
13) Are all South Indians dark?
Yeah, do all North Indians look like Pani-puri vendors?
14) Also, if you’re South Indian why are you so fair?
Appearances are deceptive my girl.
15) Why do you always wear flowers in your hair?
Why do you always wear heavy-heavy lehangas or shorts that are too short to be called shorts? 😀
16) Why are most of the South-Indians so reserved?
That’s because once we decide to engorge in the luxury of having a social life, we have annoying and highly irritating people like you firing crappy questions at us which is why most of them prefer being reserved and posing as introverts to the outside world.
So ladies and gentleman, stay away from asking such questions or face the consequences. Your call !