Growing up in a country like India most of us are made to believe in the fact that ‘Career’ is everything in life. We judge people on what they do and how much money they make. Kids are forced into engineering and made to enrol for AIEEE’s and JEE’s outside their will.
Here’s a query from an anonymous IIT aspirant who wanted to commit self-slaughter because he/she could not get through the JEE Advanced.
The anonymous user sought help in Quora stating that now he/she was scared of confessing to their father.
There were many so many replies but the best of all, came from Arpit Kubadia.
The reply will make you realize that lives don’t centre around exams and marks.
Here’s what he said,
” I’ll tell you a story
You come home after getting your results . It was really horrible (or you think so) . You’re just ready to give up.
So you go to your room, close the door, and write down a suicide note
You take out those razor blades, and cut for the very last time.
You grab that bottle of pills and take them all. Laying down, holding the letter to your chest, you close your eyes for the very last time.
A few hours later, your little brother knocks on your door to come tell you that the dinner is ready. You don’t answer, so he walks in. All he sees is you laying on your bed, so he thinks you’re asleep.
He tells this to your mom.
Your mom goes to your room to wake you up. She notices something is odd. She grabs the paper in your hand and reads it.
Sobbing, she tries to wake you up.
She’s screaming your name.
Your brother, so confused, runs to go tell Dad that Mummy is crying and sissy won’t wake up.
Your dad runs to your room.
He looks at your mom, crying, holding the letter to her chest, sitting next to your lifeless body. It hits him, what’s going on, and he screams. He screams and throws something at the wall. And then, falling to his knees, he starts to cry.
Your mom crawls over to him, and they sit there, holding each other, crying, weeping with tears.
The next day at school, there’s an announcement. The principal tells everyone about your suicide. It takes a few seconds for it to sink in, and once it does, everyone goes silent.
Everyone blames themselves.
Your teachers think they were too hard on you.
Those mean popular girls, they think of all the rubbish things they’ve said to you.
That boy that used to tease you and call you names, he can’t help but hate himself for never telling you how beautiful you really are.
Your ex boyfriend, the one that you told everything to, that broke up with you – He can’t handle it. He breaks down and starts crying, and goes out of the school.
Your friends? They’re sobbing too, wondering how they could never see that anything was wrong, wishing they could have helped you before it was too late.
And your best friend? She’s in shock.
She can’t believe it.
She knew what you were going through, but she never thought it would get that bad.
Bad enough for you to end it.
She can’t cry, she can’t feel anything. She stands up, walks out of the classroom, and just sinks to the floor.
Shaking, screaming, but no tears coming out.
It’s a few days later, at your funeral. The whole town came.
Everyone knew you, that girl with the bright smile and bubbly personality.
The one that was always there for them, the shoulder to cry on.
Lots of people talk about all the good memories they had with you, there were a lot.
Everyone’s crying, your little brother still doesn’t know you killed yourself, he’s too young.
Your parents just said you died. It hurts him, a lot.
You were his big sister, you were supposed to always be there for him.
Your best friend, she stays strong through the entire service, but as soon as they start lowering your casket into the ground, she just loses it. She cries and cries and doesn’t stop for days.
It’s two years later. The whole school talks to a counsellor therapist at least once a week.
Your teachers all quit their job.
Those mean girls have eating disorders now.
That boy that used to tease you cuts himself.
Your ex boyfriend doesn’t know how to love any more and just sleeps around with girls.
Your friends all go into depression.
Your best friend? She tried to kill herself.
She didn’t succeed like you did, but she tried.
Your brother? He finally found out the truth about your death.
He self harms, he cries at night, he does exactly what you did for years leading up to your suicide.
Your parents? Their marriage fell apart.
Your dad became a workaholic to distract himself from your death.
Your mom got diagnosed with depression and just lays in bed all day.
You may not think so, but they do.
Some of your choices don’t just affect you.
They affect everyone.
Don’t end your life, you have so much to live for.
Now tell me, do you still want to kill yourself when you can live? You have been given this beautiful life to live it to the fullest. Everyone gets the same life. But everyone treats it differently. Would you like to make the best out of your life or want to waste it? When you can travel the world, watch movies, eat Pizzas, make Pizzas, dance, sing and play; will you still choose to waste it by ending it? How you live your life is in your own hands. If you are hurt by something, you better make that thing pay for it. Your life is precious. By even thinking about ending it, you are disrespecting it. “
Moral Of The Story :
You will get another chance.
He can still come back from this
But there’s no coming back from death
And more importantly
No doubt that his parents will be mad at him for low marks
But if he does this.. It will break them.
If he’s willing to deal with this problem.. Not for anyone.. But his parents..
Be honest with him
Life won’t be a breeze now
People will look down at him
And his parents will also be mad in the beginning
But If he succeeds the next time- in anything; not necessarily this..
Then all WILL be forgotten.
So why do this to yourself when you can write, swim, dance, sing, paint, orate, run business with out of the box ideas, fall in love, find a friend you can pour your heart out and talk until dawn, live in your dream home, fly to Athens or take a hike in Rishikesh (or where ever you have always longed to), work up the adrenaline and go bungee jumping, and all that keeps your heart saying let’s live more. Why reach a stage where you are sitting in an office consumed by drapetomania (strong urge to run away) when you can make a career choice that satisfies your soul, gives you opportunities to excel, and have you rise in what you love to do.
There’s life outside exams and marks. It’s time we the folks of this generation realize that being happy and satisfied is more important than being rich and successful.
Live: Laugh and Love! Happy Living Folks! 🙂